You’ve done it again. Another Mummy Fail. Forgotten it was non-uniform day. Double-booked a play date when there is swimming. Missed the school fair preparation meeting. Got nothing in the cupboards to make a packed lunch, let alone two of them.
I do not know one single mum who hasn’t experience Mummy Fail at one time or another, and in fact most of us have suffered it many times. I know I have. And Mummy Fail tends to go hand-in-hand with its good friend Mummy Guilt, so you’ll need way to pick yourself up after yet another Mummy Fail and here’s your guide:
1) Remember that you are not alone
You might feel like the worst mum in the world right now, but you are not alone. Every mum you know, from the school playground, from swimming lessons, from playgroup, from work. All of them have also gone through Mummy Fail.
You are not a bad person. You are not a bad mum. You just dropped a ball. Or maybe one of those plates you’re spinning came crashing down. It’s ok.
Look at all those mums around you and know that they’ve all been through it too.
2) Share your Mummy Fail
Don’t bottle it up and keep all the shame inside. Get it out and share it with others. Maybe call up your best mum friend and tell her. Or let the whole world on Facebook know. (Or feel free to share it on my Facebook page – it’s a judgement-free zone.) It doesn’t matter who you share it with or how you share it, just get it out there.
By sharing your failure it won’t feel so bad anymore. You’ll laugh about it. And I’m sure your friends will come back and share similar Mummy Fails with you too.
3) Confess to your kids that mummies aren’t perfect
As a child we put our parents up on pedestals. They are so perfect. They can do no wrong. They know the answer to everything. And we feel that we can’t ever tell them the truth in case we tarnish our image for them forever.
But you can tell your kids that you make mistakes. You are allowed to tell them that sometimes you forget things. That you are fallible.
And you know what? I bet they’ll appreciate you even more because of it.
As Léna, our eldest, has got older I’ve told her on numerous times that I’ve forgotten things, and that I screw up too. It has made us even closer and, better still, made it easier for her to admit to her own downfallings as she knows that her mum ain’t perfect either!
4) Apologise to whoever you’ve done wrong
It may be the leader of the PTA. Or perhaps it’s your kids. Your child’s teacher. The childminder. Or your husband, who had to catch the ball when you dropped it.
It doesn’t matter who you hurt or let down in your Mummy Fail, what matters is that you own up to it and say sorry.
Don’t blame someone else. Raise your hand, take the blame and apologise for messing up.
And if you failed your child, no matter how young they are, you can still say sorry to them.
5) Make good if you can
Maybe your Mummy Fail was forgetting to do the shopping so you had packed lunch ingredients. Well next time have the best, favourite food in for your kids’ packed lunches to make up for it.
Or perhaps you missed the school bake sale, well next time you can always bring twice as many cakes.
Whatever the mistake was see how you can make it up to that person, so it doesn’t happen again and so that next time it’s even better than it should have been the first time.
Let me just repeat this. We all have numerous Mummy Fails, so don’t beat yourself up. You’re still a fab person and a great mum. Have a glass of wine as tomorrow is a new day 🙂
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Photo by Jordan Whitt on Unsplash
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