I love the reframe of this. I don’t believe in wrong decisions or failures, so I love looking at what “went wrong” and seeing what I learnt from it. And that’s what my best mistake was. A big lesson for me.
I’m going to take you back in time. To 2006. I was 30 years old and pregnant. At the time I was living in my dream home, in a Provençal village in the south of France.
We had watched our house being built from the ground up and I was convinced it was my forever home. This was where this baby, and any future children, would spend their childhood before leaving home and going off to university.
I had a great, interesting job with good prospects and I was well-paid.
We also had a big 25 year mortgage to pay on our fabulous house.
And we threw it all away.
The previous year before I had read Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki and it completely changed my way of thinking.
I didn’t know any entrepreneurs or business-owners, and I always assumed I would be an employee for the rest of my life. Believe it or not I’m quite risk-averse, and setting up a business seemed crazy and risky as hell.
Then I read THAT book and suddenly all I could think about was becoming an entrepreneur.
Ben had been wanting to set up his own business for the longest time, so the two of us brainstormed together and we came up with an idea.
But did we dare go through with it?
Let’s recap. We both had good, stable, well-paid jobs with great prospects. We were expecting our first baby. We had no experience of running a business. We had a big mortgage to pay.
We went backwards and forwards over the decision.
We wrote lists of pros and cons. Discussed it with friends and family (none of whom had ever set up their own business).
It was our only topic of conversation. Which was good as it took my mind off the pregnancy – I’ve never liked being pregnant!
Finally we came to a realisation that made up our minds for us.
We would rather end up with the worst case scenario of having our business fail than spending our lives wondering “what if?”.
So we went for it.
Around the same time as I birthed our first daughter, we birthed our first business.
And for anyone looking in from the outside you would say it was a mistake. A failure.
We did ok for a couple of years, but then the global recession hit.
Luckily Ben had his finger on the pulse, saw what was happening in the US and knew that we would suffer in France too.
So we made the incredibly difficult decision to sell our dream house – my forever home – and to close our business down.
HOWEVER it wasn’t a mistake or a failure for us.
Yes, it didn’t pan out as we had hoped.
But we learnt more in those few years than in our entire time at university.
Yes, it led to some difficult times. Financially and emotionally. (That’s a whole other subject for another day!)
But we both came out stronger, and so much more knowledgeable.
If that business had been a success we would have been busy. We would have been at our clients’ beck and call 24/7. We would never have been able to take relaxing time off. We would have had to stay in that one region.
Instead our business “failed”. I use inverted commas as I don’t believe anything is a failure. You succeed or you learn. Nothing is a failure.
In the same way it wasn’t a mistake or a wrong decision. It just led us down a different path. That’s all.
And that path took us from the south of France to London. To more knowledge and experiences.
Then from London to Mauritius. To our dream life. Working for ourselves with the flexibility to take days off, to go on long holidays, to spend time with our kids.
None of what I live and love today would have been possible if we had stayed in our old jobs OR if our first business had worked out.
So next time you’re struggling with a “mistake”, a “failure” or a “wrong decision” think about what you are going to learn from it. And imagine what you are going to look back and realise about it 1 year, 5 years or 10 years down the track.
What was your best mistake lovely? How did you learn from it? Do share in the comments on social media, and if you want to share more privately then join my free Facebook group, Happy Women Worldwide.
Finally if you want help with making “the right” decision make sure you get my free video guide to decision-making and facing your fears here. It’s already helped so many women move forwards and grab their life with both hands.
Big love and happy reframing!
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